THE RANT SONG (LYRICS)

Here are the lyrics for 'The Rant Song' from the fantastic show, 'Scrubs'.

PATEINT: "Dr. Cox, I'm not crazy!"
DR COX: "Am I still singing?"
PATIENT: "Singing like a bird."
J.D.: "Dr. Cox, huge news! I pulled some strings, and got the parking spot right behind YOURS! *pauses* Bumper Buddies!"
DR. COX: "Still, you aren't nearly as bad as her, do you know how much you annoy me? The answer is... a lot. Should I list the reasons why? Well I don't see why not.

DR. COX: "It's your hair your nose your chin-less face, you always need a hug! Not to mention all the manly appletinees that you chug, that you think that I am your mentor just continues to perplex, and oh my God stop telling me when you have nerdy sex!"
J.D. : Oh, by the way... last time Kim was in town, and we got some appletinees and poured them on her good parts!
DR. COX: "You that's the thing you do newbie that drives me up a tree, 'cause no matter how I rant at you, you never let me be, so I'm stuck with all your daydreaming, you wish to be my son, it makes me suicidal! and I'm not the only one! no I'm not the only one...."

JANITOR: "It all started, with a penny in the door. There was this hatred I had never felt before. So now I'll make him pay each and every day, until that moose-haired little nuisance is...no...mooooorree!"

DR. COX: "So now that is why I call you names like Carol, Jane, and Sue, like Lueisha, Kim and Lilly, and Susanne and Betty-Lou, see regardless of the names I pick, my feelings are quite clear: You're a pain in every day of every month of every year!"

PATIENT: "Dr. Cox you gotta help me, 'cause I really am distressed, can't you find another option, wont you run another test?"

DR. COX: "If you want some kind of favor, really any kind of favor, please just get me peace and quiet from this God-forsaken pest!"

J.D. : "I think what my 'Bumper Buddy' is trying to say-"

PATIENT: "Shut your cake-hole, Mary-Beth! Or I swear to God, I'll shut it sooooon!"

DR. COX: "Congratulations, we'll be scheduling your test this afternoon."